How I Didn’t Ruin My Weekend

In my last post, I wrote about how I almost ruined a rainy, can’t-do-the-gardening-I-wanted-to-do weekend. I had planned a super productive week-end of prepping and planting my veggie garden. Except we got a weekend of storms instead of sunshine, and my plans were completely thwarted. 

I wasn’t excited about a chance to slow down and relax with a good book or get caught up on some indoor projects. I also wasn’t grateful for the badly needed moisture. Instead, I was angry and annoyed at the delay in my schedule.

You’ve probably experienced this too. It’s a sense of crushing disappointment when the big project you planned isn’t going to work out the way you expected. This can be followed closely by anger and resentment that no matter how hard you hustle, you won’t be able to change your reality.

I started exploring my situation using my Leadership Ecosystem Model. I didn’t WANT to be angry and resentful; I wanted to be relaxed and joyful. I wanted to be able to enjoy the weekend with my family, regardless of the weather. 

I started with the first element, which I refer to as the Outer Journey. In this first stage, I use my most analytical, thoughtful, curious, and creative brain to look at the situation from different perspectives. 

The objective here is to slow down and think really critically (but not judgmentally) about the situation to uncover new possibilities. When we pause to explore and gently challenge our default thoughts, we can get powerful new insights.

For example, I was most worried about how the downpour was going to delay the planting of my garden. Therefore, I started by exploring the project schedule. 

The most powerful question I asked myself was this: “What’s the absolute latest I could plant the garden and still get a harvest?” This question helped me realize that I had a whole month before it would be too late! I didn’t need to cry and sulk over losing one weekend—I still had four more to work with!

As I write this, I’m honestly chuckling to myself. How ridiculous am I, truly, to forget that gardening is a co-creative process with Mother Nature? She has her own cycles and timelines that existed long before modern project management tools. 

What I realized was that my brain had automatically decided for me that I needed to plant as early as possible. Which makes perfect sense when we pause and remember that concepts like “forward progress at all costs’ is the dominant message in the corporate world.  

This example shows exactly how models like capitalism are deeply rooted in our lives. (Haha! Get the garden pun there?!?)

Only someone growing up in our corporate capitalist culture would analyze their approach to spring planting by analyzing their project schedule. Other cultures would be focused on more helpful, external data points like the height of the sun and the phase of the moon, the migration patterns and growth of local fauna and flora.

So many of our hang-ups can be traced to “rules” created by humans within a capitalist agenda. Once we identify the “rules”, they start to lose their power over our thoughts and actions.

Next time you notice you are having an emotional reaction to a situation, and you know working harder isn’t the answer, I invite you to try using this first element of my Leadership Ecosystem model.

You might just find that a little rain helps you grow some new ideas and a fresh perspective!